


the arrangement

by xslytherclawx



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: (kind of), Book 6: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Collection: Purimgifts Extras, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Gay Remus Lupin, Gen, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Lesbian Nymphadora Tonks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-17
Updated: 2019-03-17
Packaged: 2019-11-18 23:45:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18128102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xslytherclawx/pseuds/xslytherclawx
Summary: Molly Weasley thinks Tonks and Remus are dating. The problem with that is that they're both gay.





	the arrangement

**Author's Note:**

  * For [basketofnovas (slashmarks)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/slashmarks/gifts).



> This isn't technically canon-compliant, but it almost is. This takes place sometime during Half-Blood Prince.

Tonks was gay. She didn’t see _what_ was so appealing about men. She liked men, sure. She had male friends – several of whom were gay – but she never really understood what attracted Charlie to Barnaby Lee. She could understand, objectively, that Barnaby wasn’t an ugly bloke, and they both loved creatures, but –

And so, when she was reeling from the death of the gay first cousin once removed she’d really, barely known, at the hand of her horrible aunt, she didn’t really expect Remus Lupin (who had been, after all, Sirius’s partner) to show up at her flat out of the blue one day.

“Molly Weasley just interrogated me about our secret relationship,” was not, strictly speaking, what she expected Remus (who was over a decade older than her! and gay!) to say, but that didn’t stop him.

Tonks burst into laughter. Maybe that was inappropriate, but the very idea was absurd! They were both gay, for one, and he’d very obviously been with Sirius. They'd even shared a room in Grimmauld Place. “I see Molly hasn’t changed,” she said after she felt she could.

“Aren’t you close with Charlie and Bill – shouldn’t she _know?”_

“I think Molly still thinks Charlie and I dated at Hogwarts. She _definitely_ still thinks all of her kids are completely heterosexual.”

Remus, who had met all seven of the Weasley children, even if he hadn’t properly _taught_ Charlie or Bill, furrowed his brows. “Does she?”

“Charlie thinks so. Bill, too.” But then Bill was at least with Fleur, even if he wasn’t _heterosexual._ With Charlie, though, Tonks couldn’t really see why Molly hadn’t realised.

“That’s – wow.”

“Yeah,” Tonks said. “Sometimes I wonder if one of them could snog a bloke in front of her, and she still wouldn’t get it.”

“That might be a bit far.”

Tonks rolled her eyes. “She thinks you’re in love with _me,_ and not Sirius.”

“All right,” Remus said. “You’ve got an excellent point. Are you going to tell her, or shall I?”

And then Tonks had a brilliant idea. It was, in part, because she knew that Remus had once been famous at Hogwarts for pranks that Tonks could only dream of. Granted – it was more Sirius (and James Potter) than Remus, and Remus had had his friends as a team, and Tonks had mostly been on her own. But still.

“What if we don’t?” she asked.

“What do you mean?”

“What if we let her think it, and then just – be as obviously gay as possible, and see if she gets the hint?”

“Why on Earth would we do that?”

“Charlie’s always told me there’s no way Molly would believe any of them were less than totally heterosexual unless they told her outright. We could test that theory. Prove it. Or disprove it.”

“I don’t know…”

“Do you want to to tell her you’re in love with Sirius, _or_ have her try to set you up with random blokes who may or may not actually be interested in dating blokes?”

Remus paled. “Er – no.”

Tonks shrugged. “You can tell her you’re gay, if you’d like, and that’s what’ll happen if you do. But don’t tell her I’m gay, because _I_ want to see how far I can take it.”

Remus seemed to consider it. “I really don’t want Molly Weasley meddling in my personal life. And – Sirius always _did_ love having her on.”

Tonks knew better than to say anything to that. She had only viewed Sirius as a cousin, and perhaps, a bit, as a mentor. She _certainly_ hadn’t been in love with him, and no one she _had_ been in love with (not that that list was long) had ever actually died.

“All right,” Remus said after a moment. “But I can tell her that I’m gay and we’re just friends at any time.”

“Deal,” Tonks said. “We won’t out each other, but we can out ourselves at any time, if we want.”

“And we can tell others – at least that we’re not together.”

“Oh, I’m _definitely_ writing Charlie about all of this. I just wish I could tell him to his face. See his reaction. But…” She tapped her chin. “I can tell _Bill_ to his face. And Fleur will probably think it’s hilarious, too.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> Tonks is a blast, and I feel like a lot of the fandom forgets that she had her fair share of hijinks and pranks at school (at least if Hogwarts Mystery is to be believed) - I wouldn't put this past her.


End file.
